This is Article number 1 in a series of 6 written by Kai Rainey who lost more than half of her 300 pounds by changing her lifestyle and doing Crossfit.

From the outside, no one can tell that you think about your health and fitness every single day.

Nothing about your actions or appearance suggests that you care.

If they only knew.

I know.

At 42, I was over 300 lb.—officially morbidly obese, with a BMI of 49.9. Painful hip joints, painful knees, plantar fasciitis and minimal capacity to breathe all dictated a sedentary life. I could see the future: I knew my quality of life would continue its downward trend.

I know it feels like you woke up fat one day. You didn’t, of course, but by the time you realized your weight had become a problem, you had more than a few pounds to lose. Maybe you saw a photo of yourself and didn’t recognize the chubby person in the back until you identified your own shirt. Maybe laundry-day desperation made you realize you can’t even pull up a formerly too-snug pair of jeans you had been avoiding.

You are angry with yourself for letting it get this bad, and you know this isn’t who you are meant to be.

At her heaviest, the author weighed more than 300 lb. She lost more than half by working out and eating properly. (Courtesy of Kai Rainey)

Getting to this point was easy, mindless. You say, “Life happened.” Kids, school, money issues, time pressures—everything became a reason you couldn’t make it to the gym or didn’t have time to eat better. Late nights at work made a stop at McDonald’s for dinner the path of least resistance. Takeout food seemed like a lifesaver, and soon nearly every meal came from a drive-thru window. You have to think hard to recall the last time you sliced up some vegetables.

The mirror is not your friend. You look at your face and wonder how you didn’t see all the extra padding start to appear. You used to have cheekbones and a defined jaw. You used to wink at your reflection, excited to take on the day. Now you glance at yourself and regret doing so. You stare into those eyes and dare the old you to fight your way out. You know this reflection isn’t really you, and you want to change it. You just don’t know how to start.

Read the rest of the article here

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